I’m going out of town with my girlfriend and I can’t wait! A vacation is exactly what I need right now. However, there’s my mother. She has nothing nice to say about my girlfriend.

Apparently my mother had a bad interaction with my girlfriend and says she won’t talk to her until she receives an apology. It’s insane. But my mother has dug her heels in the sand for over a year and made this a living hell for me. She constantly asks me, “please tell me you won’t marry that girl and ruin our family? We can’t continue to talk to you if you’d choose a Jezebel over us? She’s a manipulative *****.” I mean, come on, the irony for this statement writes itself. But it is horrible to hear her say this to me. I tell her to stop and walk away, but even after months, she still does it.

I’ve decided to go and visit my girlfriend, and what’s crazy to me, is I’m dreading telling my mother. And I know you’re reading this and physically cringing, that an almost 30 year old man is going to his mother to ask for permission. The thing is, she’s always asking me what I’m up to. Or asking me to check in when I drive 15 minutes away to work. She wants to know everything I’m doing and I hate it. So, I can’t just disappear for a weekend because she’ll expect updates and to know where I’m going. She says it’s not to be nosy but that she misses me and what’s to let me know she’s thinking of me.

So I’m stressed out of my mind. I’m terrified to bring this up to her. She’s going to throw an even BIGGER tantrum and say god awful things. I mean, seriously, she keeps asking me if I’m having sex with my girlfriend??? I’ve told her to stop and don’t answer her BUT SHE KEEPS ASKING. And it’s not just a simple fit about me seeing my girlfriend, oh no, she says that a man who is a Christian wouldn’t do such a thing because I am to “avoid the appearance of sin” as the Bible lovingly commands. But why does she need to be concerned with my life and my job and my feelings? I’m not even a Christian (I haven’t come out with it, but I’m pretty sure they know) so this stuff doesn’t do anything for me.

How in the hell do I deal with any of this? How do I grow some balls and just stand up for myself? Why in the hell am I so afraid to make a decision that I know is gonna piss my mother off?

How did you do it?