TW: Death. My (22F) JY Father died yesterday after being on life support for almost two weeks after he suffered Cardiac Arrest. He was 59 years old. My family ( including my father when he was alive), have had to distance ourselves from his parents as they are very manipulative and thrive on drama. My grandmother especially. We had to stop her from trying to take over the situation yesterday and my father was unable to go peacefully at first as she kept carrying on to my father, my mom, me, and everyone else in the room ( It was over the top, and disrespectful to a dying person the way she acted so that’s why I say this. I know that she was upset that my father was dying.) and trying to get my mom( 53F) not to be the last person with him so she could make the situation about herself rather than my father. On top of that my grandfather left his phone on and it kept going off even though we told him to silence it while being in the room with my dad. I tried to help him but he wouldn’t let me. We finally had to have them leave the room as nurses took my father off life support.

We still haven’t told them that there’s only going to be a small church service and luncheon and no funeral per my dad’s written wishes in his will. I am worried that my JNGrandparents( 80M, and 76F) will try to hassle my mom and I about it or be abusive to us, and I’m not sure how to kindly set a boundary to tell them that these were my dad’s wishes and not to hassle my mom and I about this again. I’m welcoming advice on this because this situation is so hard.