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So I caught my (38M) wife (44F) of 10 years having a full blown affair with a co-worker of hers about 7 months ago. We tried to reconcile for a short period, but the trust & respect just wasnāt there any more & she didnāt want to work towards rebuilding it.
We have 3 young kids with 2 that are still in elementary school age and 1 that is in middle school. Iām at that stage now where Iām getting ready to move out soon & file for divorce. Iām in a āno-faultā state & I make significantly more than her so no matter what Iām screwed in the divorce process & the house so I have to leave.
My concern is what do I tell my kids & should I tell them the truth that their mother cheated on me & thatās why I have to move away? Iām primarily concerned that if I donāt tell them the truth my kids are going to assume or feel like I abandoned them & went out on my own. I feel guilty about not telling them the truth not to mention their mother basically getting a free pass for her cheating & destroying our comfortable family life.
Should I or should I not tell them? Seeking serious advice hereā¦
Do not unload this trauma onto your children. You explain to them that mommy and daddy couldn't make it work and that it was better to separate. Hopefully you both can agree on that. later, when they can process such trauma properly, maybe then you can share.
You can't just order the owner the of the home to the couch or to move out, keep that in mind. They don't have to leave if they don't want to.
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You can't even force them out of the master bedroom. They have as much right to those things as you do.