NO, I'm not here to share pics because as a female, that means 1 of 2 things. 1. Bot/OF/Pro or 2. In the case of a real, legitimate female, like myself, the post will get so many unsolicited dick pics in my inbox that I will have to nuke the post and shut it down in under an hour.

So sorry, I can't share photos of these amazing tits, legs, or tight little ass. You're just going to have to believe me when I say that I'm a solid 6 out of 10. I'm healthy and average. Don't believe me? Oh well, get fucked.

Now that I've weeded out the choad pic collectors, who else can I shake loose with a reality dose of disappointment? Ah yes, I'm sorry but if I have shoes older than you or if you were born before Nixon was in office, I am confident that we are not going to be a good fit. I generally find myself attracted to MEN who are near my own age. Sorry to all the guys in their 20s who are probably a great fuck and not scared of older women! I'm gonna take a pass.

If you are a long time lurker but you're not going to actually meet up in person with a stranger you met on the internet, please move along. I'm looking to make a real life connection. Probably not this week because I've got a lot going on. But I fully intend to get hands on.

OK, is there anyone left still reading? Are you also looking for a FWB? Can we put the Friends back in it? Cool. And if we are gonna add the WB part, I've gotta be attracted to you too. Funny goes a long way in my book. So does dedication to physical health. I sometimes say no to cookies, I always find time to exercise, and I don't drink. If you can match that sort of energy on giving a damn about your health, come at me, bro. I'm not saying you need chiseled abs but it wouldn't hurt.

Well shit, it seems I'm all alone again. Oh well, I guess I'll go play with myself. If you did make it this far and you still wanna shoot your shot, I guess I'll see you in the chat feature?