A few weeks ago I was on a detective mission and casually text my sister in law, basically trying to find if my wife had mentioned anything about having an affair, or if she knew of any reasons why we weren’t having sex anymore. Obviously I didn’t say those words specifically, but that’s what I was trying to find out. I mentioned that I believed she had been hooking up with one of her coworkers for the past year, from a few of the text I saw on her phone. I said that surprisingly I wasn’t as upset as I thought I should be, and that I just wished she would have been upfront with me, rather than making me feel like something was wrong with me. The conversation ended up going in a way different direction than what I expected, when I told her I honestly didn’t care if she was fucking some guy, but that I didn’t deserve to be deprived either. I told her I just wanted to find a place where I could relax, and just be myself for a little while. Jokingly I said I just wanted to be able to watch some porn without my headphones and masturbate wildly for a few hours, without having to hide and feel like a perv. If I got caught. Well.. at first I thought it was a joke but she said that if wanted, I could do that at her place whenever. She also said that if It didn’t bother me, that she would even watch it with me and that we could masturbate together… I kinda brushed it off as just being silly but not too long ago she sent me pictures of her in her panties. She really isn’t my type, but I’m having a hard time controlling my urges. Honestly, I kinda want to because I’m horny :/ but I’m actually worried we’ll just end up fucking, and I’m not wanting that to happen with her. Plus the drama that could possibly develop later.. not to mention I think it’s been so long since I’ve had sex that I’d have a hard time saying no if she just jumped on me, even if I think I have self control. So far I’m leaning towards continuing porn in hiding lol. What would you do in my case??