Not really sure where to start or even what to ask first. I 26m and my wife (29) and our sex lives have been getting a lot more spicy the last year. We have been married for a little over a year and a half and we dated for 3 years before that I have always kinda had a thing for stretching over the past couple of years but I just never really brought it into our relationship because I was freakishly nervous that she would judge me. In October last year we were talking dirty while masterbating and I admitted I had a kink over stretching. Since then we’ve done quite a few things involving that (not to get too spicy) but I’ve also developed a kink over watching her with someone else. For a while I thought it’s just a kink and when I’m not horny I’d get pissed the hell off thinking about her doing it. Once again we both were masterbating together and I admitted to her that I wanted to watch that and was nervous about how she felt. She told me she thought it was hot and we talked about the things I’d want her doing that to entail. She didn’t get judgy or angry she told me it made her horny and she came hard. Flash forward a few months. We have done an awful lot of dirty talking, and she wants to be stretched everytime we have sex, and she wants me to talk dirty to her about what I want to watch her do, but everytime after we do that she tells me that she hopes I understand it will never happen because she doesn’t want to bring that into the relationship for fear that it effects us negatively. My question is , if it’s something I want to pursue how do I reassure her and quench those fears. Her insistence on talking dirty about it every time we make love opens my mind up to the whole fantasy and all the possibilities, which in turn makes it harder for me to not indulge in the lifestyle and harder to control my thoughts and reign myself in . I lust over her entirely. I think she is the most amazing and sexy woman I have ever laid my eyes upon and ultimately, while it makes me horny, during my times of level headed thoughts, I have realized it’s more than just a fantasy. I want her to be pleased in every way. I want her to indulge herself and seek self enjoyment out of it. I want her to feel loved and cared for while being allowed to chase her sexual desires without fear of me being hurt and messed up after we fully indulge in the lifestyle.