Short backstory: Did your first mfm last summer and let the wife play alone a couple weeks ago for the first time. We met this guy at a club and he seemed very respectful of our marriage.

I noticed her behavior being off for the last week or so. Asked her about it, she told me not to worry. She kept more and more distancing herself for the last couple days.

Today I confronted her and it turns out she saved up everything I did wrong the past 10 years and she's having doubts. Shit happens, we can work this out.

I noticed she held something back so I asked if X has anything to do with it and she admitted she caught emotional feelings after their playtime. She tried to break it off but couldn't.

I'm honestly gutted. Ive always thought our marriage was great besides the usual shit that happens when you have two small children. Boundaries where in place and she always seemed to obey them. Turns out this guy was a poacher after all and she fell for it.

At this point I'm considering what to do. I really want to work it out but that will only work if she's strong enough to resist him.

Lesson learned.

Edit: thanks for the kind words. We had a really long talk and realised she's in a bad headspace and feels stuck in her current situation. She very overwhelmed by what happened and needs space to get her mind sorted. We decided to take a break for her to figure out what she wants in life.