We’ve been on this journey into openly discussing our hotwife fantasy for a little over a year now. I, hubby, have had the fantasy kept secret for many years. Wife has found the fantasy of a threesome with another man very enticing since I came out about it, but her comfort level of talking about it and exploring deeper into the fantasy has taken a baby step approach. We’ve incorporated toys, dirty talk and role play all relating to her as a hotwife and it’s been amazingly hot.

Honestly been awesome how she’s responded and become more comfortable with it all, allowed herself to explore a more sexual side to her without feeling shame or guilt. I’ve made sure to communicate that this fantasy hinges on her pleasure in it. It’s taken her a while to grasp this specifically since she can’t see herself feeling the same if I were with another woman. Part of this journey has been making her understand my side of it, and that being with another woman doesn’t enhance our relationship experience, then I don’t need or want it.

I believe she’s finally come around to understanding that, and can honestly say that we both share mutual interests in hotwife lifestyle. She’s been vocal about her needs, especially regarding her preferred type of guy, location, health requirements and even personality type. I make this clear, because she does want a more “naturalistic” approach on her end. The prospect of actively finding a guy online, at this moment, isn’t something that’s a turn on for her. Pretty much is on me or simple “luck” to find a “friend” that would be suitable for the experience when she finally lets me know she’s open to trying it for real.

That gets us to this past weekend.

Over the weekend we went out shopping as we’re renovating our home. We needed a break from looking at flooring and appliances, stopped at a restaurant for lunch. She was in a great mood and enjoying the experience of building our dream home. While talking the topic of Father’s Day came up, what we were gonna do that day etc.. Then she asked what I wanted? I told her earnestly I didn’t know, she could surprise me. Then she followed up with a smirk “I know what you want”. I replied laughing because I truly wondered what was so humorous about that, asked her what’s that?. She replied “do you want a gift, or do you want an EXPERIENCE?”, but said it with a shyer face this time still with slight smirk.

Im not gonna lie, I got an instant hard on lol and guess what I did? I chickened out and went with the most vanilla answer lmao Told her it being Father’s Day a gift involving spending time with our son is fine. She was not one bit upset or let down by my response as she loved the sentiment (and I’m honest about that too).

But still, I do want the experience. But my knee jerk reaction was to go away from that and not 100% certain why. I guess if I’m frank I’m not comfortable with the idea of this experience being an ultimatum just for me. But on the flip side, is an ultimatum contingency part of my wife’s process of giving herself permission to try it and justify it in a meaningful and loving way?

Either way we moved on from the conversation to other topics, but it’s stayed on my mind.

I know another convo is going to be needed, so that I can confirm her proposing an experience is her letting me know she’s ready and start the process that we’ve discussed regarding finding the right guy (me vetting before to meet for greeting, she has say from there).