Hi. My husband recently shared he has this fantasy with me, and I was seriously shocked. I never imagined this would be something he would be interested in.
My first reaction was a hard NO on ever doing anything like this. We have kids and Iām in okay shape but not like I was ten years ago. I also canāt imagine actuallyā¦doing things with someone besides my husband.
But after I started to really fantasize about it, something about it did turn me on, which made me feel a little ashamed. Itās just a lot to handle I guess.
Before we were married, I definitely went through aā¦phase I guess. Haha. I was pretty promiscuous with a group of work friends and slept around, got into some situations I regret. My husband has always asked me about those times but I always feel ashamed to give him too much detail. I know itās hot for him to hear about the things I did during those years, but not all of it was fun looking back. He doesnāt understand.
Anyway part of me worries that going through with something like a hotwife fantasy is āopeningā up that side of me again. I donāt know if that makes sense, but I love my husband and would never dare cheat on him. The person I was in my early 20s is a different person.
I also, well, I guess thereās no way to put this other than Iām worried about having an orgasm with another man. Iām worried that will hurt my husband or make him feel invalidated. We often use toys and vibrators to get me there these days (been having sex for over a decade now). But I also know my body, and if someone new is touching meā¦I donāt think Iāll need toys or vibrators. Is this a normal fear?
I apologize if any of this is scattered or seems weird. Just trying to figure out where Iām at with all of this.
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