Wife and I have been talking about trying the Hotwife fantasy on and off since we’ve been together. I actually joked about it on our first date and her initial reaction was, “that actually sounds kind of hot.”

The reason I want this for her and me is that I am a lot more sexually experienced than her and I instinctively believe that she’s only scratched the surface of what she’s capable of sexually. She was in a 10 year relationship that robbed her of a lot of prime years in her 20s and 30s.

I am not wanting to do this to “fix” our relationship in any way. Our sex life is currently great and has been for a while because I’ve been making an effort to tell her how sexy I think she is. From my perspective, our bond is unbreakable. I would never leave her and I am 100% sure she would never leave me.

What’s ironic about this lifestyle is that outsiders think the guy has confidence issues when it’s exactly the opposite. I know my wife loves me and I also know that she knows the difference between fucking and making love.

We got married two years ago and I’ve been super sensitive about bringing this fantasy up. There have been moments when she’s had some fun with it (using it as dirty talk during sex a few times) and she says she’s open to it with “the right guy, in the right circumstances.”

So here’s my plan for those perfect circumstances. I’m insistent that I pick the guy and then she gets to know him and ultimately decides whether or not to go through with it. While she was traveling recently, I went on Tinder, posted some full body faceless pics of her, and used the remote location setting to swipe for guys in the mountain town we’re going skiing at for a few weeks this winter.

I found the perfect guy. At least, he’s perfect for what I want. I hope the wife approves. DM me if you’d like to see a pic of him. I think just about any woman would find this guy attractive unless they don’t like tall, really fit and athletic guys that have the personality of a Mountain Man gentleman. I’m average height and have always had short hair. I’m also something of a city boy as much as I’d like to be a gritty outdoorsmen. I want her to have someone that’s completely different from me. This dude fits the bill and then some because he’s really cool. Talked with him for a while over text and knows the deal. Wife has the power to bail on the idea at any point. This is our first time, so we gotta go slow, etc.

As of now, he thinks we’re going to play it as if he and I know each other through the ski community because I once upon a time worked for a mountain not far from his. But what I’m going to do…not just b/c it’s empowering for the wife but also b/c it’s dishonest to deceive your wife…is tell her about this guy, be completely honest about finding him Tinder while she was traveling, and letting her see my text convo with him. Total transparency. Probably reveal all of that to her 2-3 weeks out from the ski trip.

So when we meet him…if we meet him…he won’t know she knows why he’s there, putting her in the driver’s seat. If she doesn’t click with him, she can just walk away. If she does, which I really think she will, we’ll go skiing a few times, enjoy some Apres, grab a hot tub…and eventually…make the fantasy a reality. One thing I really want once she says she’s close to ready to doing it is for them to grab dinner while I watch from the bar. I think it’s important they have some private time without me around because I want/need to see everything else.

That’s one preference I’m surprised isn’t more popular. How can you not want to see and feel exactly what happens between your wife and the dude? Maybe some guys find the mystery of what happened and hearing about it from their wife sexier than seeing it but to me that’s the key to the experience not feeling like she’s cheating. If I’m there, it’s because I approve and she has permission to have as much fun as she wants.

Anyway, let me know what you think of this plan either in the comments or through a dm. The part of the experience she’ll be missing out on is finding the guy but once she sees the guy I found, I think she’ll get over that real quick.