My wife and I have been together since high school, the only ones each other has ever been with sexually. This fantasy started for me when I was 19, reading Penthouse letters. I would bring the mags over to my wife, then girlfriend and would go down on her while she read them. It was a hot fantasy, that went on into our 20s then 30s, we would watch gangbang porn & really get into it, we bought toys that were bigger than me, and would have hours of fun, but when I tried to actually to have this really happen, she would back off saying it was only a fantasy, and that she didn’t want it to be real. By the late 30s, she was backing off of it, if I pushed a little she would say well this is all your thing not mine. So I just said ok that’s it, I’m done. This is where it gets really confusing, a few years go by, we are in our early 40s and she decided to post on a social networking type site for friends to workout with, I was like ok cool, I never really followed up with it. She started acting really secretive about her phone over a period of a few months and then I find out that she’s been talking to guys, sexting, and possibly more through an app. She used the excuse well you wanted a hot wife. She said it was only texting and sharing nudes, but I had no idea this was going on. I felt betrayed. We almost divorced, but we both went to therapy & spent sometime rebuilding us. We are now talking about hot wife lifestyle again and she seems very ready. Even though she betrayed me to some degree, I’m still very much turned on by it. my question is, does it take some women a longer time to really want this? Like is it an age thing? She said that she didn’t want to before because she thought I was going to say well, you did it now I get to sleep with another woman. But that’s NEVER been a thing for me. She gets very jealous of other woman, even if one checks me out, it’s an issue. I was thinking maybe she realized that she was going to only have been with one man for whole life and she is curious now in her 40s?