Hi Everyone - first post in the group. My wife has been HW for about 2 months now. It has been so hit and miss with only 1 actual sex date. She has a second lined up for this weekend with a guy that she's met twice for coffee (second time with lots of kissing). The first sex date (1st guy), I dealt with fine. I made sure I had loads to do around the house and kept busy until she got home. Problem is, this second guy lives too far away to expect her to drive home afterwards. He had asked a few times about a sleepover and this was on our list of rules as "no sleep overs", but due to the situation I have reluctantly agreed. Bearing in mind, they have had no sexual contact up till this point so you can imagine, with the freedom of no time constraints, this is going to be a complete fuckfest. I have no idea how i'm going to get on. Its only Thursday and i'm already anxious. In her head (from talking to her), she is going to go over, they will fuck, sleep, she will come home. In my head its going to be an all night porn film.

How the hell do you deal with this? Especially seen as this is our first sleepover experience and this was a rule that I agreed to break even though i knew it was to my own detriment.

My second question is about messages. She is on a dating app where if people seem to be working out, they get moved over to WhatsApp. At the beginning of this journal, she was flat out on dating app, maybe talking to about 6 people, maybe 2 would get moved over to WhatsApp and they would become serious contenders. The Dating App activities would die down. Due to a few dates not working out (not any that i've already mentioned), the dating app is back in full swing, along with WhatsApp and it seems that every evening is just a solid 4 hours of messaging. In the bath, watching TV, in bed and every now and again I will even notice a little dirty grin at a message. It seems like its one of those things that once you have noticed, you cant unnotice and the constant messaging starts to grate away at you. I know that these people are only part of a "weeding out" process but does anyone else have this problem? If I ask who she is messaging she will tell me but I dont want to sound like a broken record as it will wear very thin very fast.

When I compare this, with the sleepover situation it seems very insignificant.