My gf and I are both 22, and have been dating for four years, and have an amazing relationship with few problems (none very serious) that we dealt with fairly reasonably. Our sex life has always been pretty good, we have sex regularly and she’s sometimes down to try new things. A vast majority of the time our sex is routine; we make out, some hands stuff, I go down on her (I rarely get bj), and then we have sex. Don’t get me wrong I love her and I love the sex we have together, but I am a kinky, adventurous partner and I want to try more, mainly regarding this lifestyle and the various kinks that come with it. As hotwifing, locking, and power play are my top kinks/ fetishes.

We had a little chat the other night about our sex life. We didn’t chat a lot, but I told her I do want to have a conversation about our sex life while we’re home for the holidays. Basically, I just asked her why it was so hard for her to talk about sex or explore sexual things because she always shys away from dirty convos or only talks about them briefly. She said she just has confidence issues and other internal things that kind of keep her from exploring that side of herself. It broke my heart to hear her say that, and I told her I understood, and that I would love to help her find her sexuality as much or as little as she wants me too. I told her there are things I’m interested in and would like to chat about, but I’m not trying to rush or push her to do anything. My top priority now is trying to build her confidence, and giving her a space where she can feel free to talk and explore anything without judgement, even if it means giving her the space and privacy she needs to discover herself, as it is a personal journey I’m sure.

My question to the women here is how can I do that for my amazing gf? What are some ways I can build her confidence and encourage her to find what pleases her sexually?