Hi, I would appreciate if you can suggest on how to go ahead with this situation. Wife and I have slowly moved into this lifestyle and identified a bull whom my wife enjoys playing with using a popular app. I'll list out the series of events and based on this please suggest: - 1 year ago we started going online and doing a bit of exhibitionist shows where we would share wife's nudes and get off. PS this was done discreetly such as no names or face was shared. - few months after this I encouraged wife to be more active while doing these kinky acts like she should chat and talk dirty and share voice messages with guys we added. She resisted but later loved the idea and got hooked to one guy. - we discussed that we are loving this kink and rush and we continued and progressed from chatting to video calls. Note that third was insisting on showing faces and 1:1 sessions with wife alone. I felt some red flags but wife was too obsessed and felt like it's not a big deal so I got her on with the app and she had freedom to chat and explore but we agreed on boundaries such as no 1:1 sessions where she discloses any personal details but this was breached. Wife was too carried away with bulls attention and smooth talks. Her response was like it's not a big deal. This causes some tensions but we moved on. - few months after I was traveling for work and wife was alone. I felt some strange disconnect when I was away, she would usually text to check on me and call but all this was missing this time and I was getting frustrated with this lack of attention, we fought over the call. She said she needs rest and she called up the guy and they both went on for a long time on call. This happened twice in two different nights. This I discovered after a week when I returned. First she denied but later accepted that she did not keep the promise about boundaries. The bull kept manipulation on and not respected boundaries as well by pushing her to disclose personal info and face photos . Later after finding out this we almost were not able to connect emotionally due to the breach of trust. - did a background check on bull he turned out to be a collector and had a thing about manipulation and humiliation by sharing pics in different groups and body shaming and degrading women. Informed wife about his true face and it broke her down and she gave me some of her insights about why he may be a fucked up person and she seemed to be very pissed off and depressed. This went on for a couple of weeks. She bid bye and removed him and herself from the app. -Wife was too fascinated with BDSM and being a sub. So she still continues to be turned on with him and she told me she misses the attention and kink and not the guy in particular. I told her we will make it work as it's a lot of fun when we both work as a team and explore the kink. - since she loves and is familiar with her crush or obsession and the whole act being so exciting we both did it again and on a call we played around but took back some control like deciding doing things that we are comfortable with and not just pleasing the third and not agreeing with his demands like showing full face and calling names such as slut whore cumslut - Third is again trying to reach out to wife and sending messages which sounds like manipulation and convincing her that I need it more than them. I am actually now in a dilemma I know for sure that this guy is not honest and he is using her and also trying to use me. It's difficult to explain my wife without her being feeling hurt or we arguing. I think she might have matured more now but I'll like to take your suggestions before proceeding.

Thanks for your help and patience.