We're still at the beginning of our journey. She's made out with guys in front of me at the club, but nothing more. We're in serious-ish talks about pushing the boundaries and hkw we'd go about it, and she's made it clear that she's doing this because I want it.

Most of my fantasies are of the stag/vixen variety. Her having fun while one of us ia away on vacation or, when we're together, either 3somes or me being the camera man but still involved. But I've admitted that it'd be fun, once in a long while, to be held out of the action and forced to watch her go to town.

As we decide to pursue finding her a partner, we've talked about finding a lifestyle group to meet up with and find some potential partners. We have friends in other cities who have gone this route for their swinging.

My wife's hard line is me with other women. Its a total no go. I don't have much interest (not "zero interest" but pretty close to zero) in other women, but I had the realization that it might be hard to meet swingers and walk the line between emasculated cu*k and not totally submissive, still slightly retaining my dignity stag as we meet people and announce "I'd like you to fuck my wife".

So, some questions for real life:

• are most lifestyle meetups mostly pure swingers and less one-sided couples? Or is it frequently all over the board?

• any advice on meeting people (guys, couples) at these meetups and telling them my wife is free to fuck like crazy without it defaulting to hard submissive cu*king?