So I don’t know where to begin with this. I’m looking for advice on coaching my mother who had a stroke over 10 years ago who isn’t 100% back to her normal self to get back to some sense of agency so she can at least carry a phone and be able to make calls at the very least.

After her stroke, she lost the ability to speak English, sew (she used to make hmong dresses all the time growing up) and used to disassociate my siblings and I’s names because of that. My father divorced and remarried so he’s out of the picture but my mom is barely a person and thanks to my siblings all she does is just watch hmong movies on YouTube all day everyday.

When I looked at how she spends her days with my brothers and their kids (the kids don’t want to speak hmong) she doesn’t speak to anyone unless they’re just checking in on her and hardly has any desires to do anything because she feels like she can’t handle it. She’ll spend a few hours here or there on an exercise bike just to get the motion, not to break a sweat. Over the years she’s improved dramatically, being able to hold short to medium conversations, she can think for herself but there are a few lapses here or there. It’s to be expected because she’s not going to be back to her old self, ever because of this medical situation she falls in on top of her diabetes.

Anyways circling back I wanted to see if anyone else has had stories like this that can help guide me through some expectations and somethings to maybe add onto after she gets comfortable with a phone. My older brother bought her a phone so I’m hoping this will be a good start for her even in her old age (some where in her early 70’s I think). I guess I should also mention my hmong language skills are below average. It’s improved over the last year but not enough to hold deep conversations. Any advice would be appreciated as well.