Dearest Tsarina Catherine,

Many men have lost their lives in this war, men of strong Russian and Swedish stock. We have both made gains. We have both proven out mettle on the field of battle.

I have come to realize that this war is a folly. The countless lives lost. I was on the front line and I saw the blood and the horror—the intenstines thrown across the ground like some disgusting French dish. I am now glad that I did not send assassins to kill you. I am sorry for this war it was mean of me.

We are cousins you and I. Cousins shouldn’t fight. God would not smile fondly on this. To preserve our two countries, and our men, I ask of you a peace, the conditions are outined below.

• Status Quo Ante Bellum

• Russia will give the ship-of-the-line Prints Gustav (74) to Sweden

• Sweden will give the ship-of-the-line Sophia Magdalena (74) to Russia

• Swedish artists will create a painting of Catherine II for display in your palace

• Russian artists will create a painting of Gustav III for display in our palace

• Sweden will build a monument of King Gustav III shaking hands with Tsarina Catherine II in Stockholm

• Russia will build a monument of Tsarina Catherine II shaking hands with King Gustav III in St. Petersburg

• Russia and Sweden will sign a treaty of peace that will last until 1795, with the option for renewal upon its expiration.

• Russia will allow Sweden reduced tariffs in St Petersburg

• Sweden will provide Russia with a discounted sound toll passage at the Öresund

We trust our cousin and friend Tsarina Catherine II can agree to these terms and towards a new age of posterity prosperity for both our countries!

Yours under God,

His Majesty, King Gustav III, King of the Swedes, Finns, Wends and Goths, Duke of Pomerania, Prince of Rügen and Lord of Wismar, Heir to Norway and Duke of Schleswig-Holstein, Stormarn and Dithmarschen, Count of Oldenburg and Delmenhorst, etc. etc.