It wasn’t intentional, the condom came off inside me and neither of us realized until I got off of him, but that almost makes me feel worse. If it had been on purpose, if he had stealthier me, I would have a reason to feel the way I feel and someone to blame. As it stands, I feel violated and haven’t been able to stop crying and I feel stupid and frustrated and helpless.

He paid for plan B so I took that immediately after the booking. I’m looking into Pep but I’m worried because apparently it costs $600-1000 and I can’t afford that, and idk if he would agree to pay for it. Idk I just feel like such a mess right now, I’m incredibly depressed and shaken up and feel so violated.

I don’t have anyone to talk to about this and I just needed to let it out. If any of you have experiences with Pep and wouldn’t mind sharing them?

Edit: I got prescribed PEP today and pick up the second half of my pills tomorrow, so I will start the regimen tomorrow. My best friend took me out for an emotional support day, and I’m still a little sad, but doing much better mentally. I’m definitely going to ask my client to cover the cost of the testing and my clinic appointments. Thank you guys SO much for your support and advice, I appreciate you guys and this community so much.

Edit 2: I wanted to come back and share that I’m on PEP and my client did reimburse me for my clinic trips and lab work. Thanks everyone for the love and support. I really was feeling at my worst and honestly was teetering on the edge of a panic attack for days, but you guys helped keep me level headed and grounded. Thank you guys so much ❤️