hey guys! hope everything is well with anyone reading this.

im a 22yo who finally got out of a 4yo long living situation with a physically/emotionally abusive stepfather as of december. im really grateful i was able to find resources through my college to get proper housing where im safe, and having some support.

anyone who knows me would probably describe me as funny, active and overall positive (sorry for the self suck) despite all the challenges i was facing at home and having bipolar disorder type 2. however, ever since leaving, i feel like i totally lost my senses. i think im a hardworking and smart person, but now i just feel the complete opposite.

im failing most of my classes (which are easy), and i dont have any drive to leave my apartment or get things done anymore. i’m struggling with really simple things like attending lectures and doing busy work assignments, and just being present in general.

ive been seeking out therapy, but at this point my situation feels really complex and i feel isolated from everyone else on top of having no motivation to do anything, other than play games, work out (sometimes) and hook up with people on tinder.

i figured that breaking down like this might be a way of processing everything ive gone through, but this has been going on for 2 months and now it feels like its getting out of hand.

my atrocious money management and slipping grades are weighing on top of already present suicidal thoughts. maybe being abused was a huge factor of me always doing things and being away from home as long as possible, but now i have no idea of how recuperate the strong drive i once had. i feel like im rotting from the inside.

there are a lot more complexities relating to my family life, but this is the core problem i have. i appreciate any kind of comments people may have