I would like to share something that has helped me and might seem a bit kooky but in my mind it makes sense. As a lot of psychology started with Freud and Jung, I have starting CliffNotes reading Jung (I will eventually get to Freud), but I have found starting with first principles of a topic tends to help me answer why a lot better than simply lol just do it bro. I am working slowly into reading more in depth with Jung and so for anyone more knowledgeable on psychology forgive any misinterpretations I have.

As I was reading up on Jung's Anima and Animus, a few things struck me. By undervaluing and under developing my Anima as a man, I will attract people who are under developed as well (with their Animus, as I am heterosexual) and there is a negative feedback as we are both underdeveloped and will ultimately project on to each other and be co-dependent. Further, some people take advantage of the need to externally project and manipulate and use you and you will attract people like that if you do not work on your Anima (and your shadow, but I will get to that in a minute). This put "work on yourself" into a better context. Instead of waiting on someone else to show you empathy, show yourself empathy. Instead of needing someone to care for you, care for yourself. By doing this, I realized I did not "need someone", but I wanted to enjoy my human experience and maybe find someone along the way.

The second part was my mask and shadow. On the outside I was nice, quiet, and whatnot. However, inside I am very competitive and sometimes feel like telling people off. I am still working on this but one thing I might try as I have had this happen to me lately is I have had random people just start talking to me at random places and times. I might try to express what I really feel (not that they annoy me or something like that honestly), but what truly has been on my mind. I have realized being on the spectrum and being an introvert, I come across as in the Uncanny Valley, despite trying to be normal. However, by showing something other than blankness, that seems more normal that trying to be quiet. And by talking with people that came up to you, there is more incentive for them to listen than just infodumping on some poor soul your chose to dump on.

I am still working on this, but have had some good early success. Have any of you looked into Jung?