I am having a lot of trouble with my mother who won't listen to me nor my father.

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Around 20 years ago she was bullied at her workplace for a couple reasons. She was being called an alcoholic, homosexual and a few other things. Despite all of this she stayed there for a very long time and this affected her mentality towards the world a lot. She often feels like she is being mocked by complete strangers. Like she is being laughed at by a cashier who had a tiny bit of smile on her face. I was next to her when this happened and the cashier was completely normal and didn't do this. However she claims this happens on the weekly basis to her and that everyone is an asshole to her because her old co-workers kept spreading false rumours about her for multiple decades. We tell her this is unreasonable and that they wouldn't care this much about her but she claims we are ignorant towards her because of this. (Basically takes this as an insult) She bases any unfortunate event happening to her as her old peers plotting in the background against her and laughing at her misery, which is ridiculous..

She also remembers these events from tens of years ago like my father asking her to call a seller about a car's conditions which is on sale which was also humiliating to her because she had to do this as a woman or im not sure, but she holds a serious grudge to my father because of it. (There are tons of small stuff like this) Today I asked her if she knows if there is a specific type of meat at a grocery store and for some reason she insinuated that she has to go ask them this for some reason meanwhile I just asked if she knows, this ignited this old memory of the car sale call and she immediately got very mad at me just for this simple question. She denied that I only asked her this, she said that I was very agressively prying this information out of her and that I was forcing her to get the information. (not true) I got upsed at this because she was basically lying about what I said and told her she is acting unreasonably and kind of childish. She then doubled down on this (this usually happens) and took this as me calling her an "unreasonable mother", taking my advice as an insult which is common for her. Her freakout ended by she saying that she won't support me with anything anymore and stormed off to gossip about me to her mother. On top of that she pretends like im the one with a mental problem, not her. I admit that I raised my voice, however I find it very frustrating that she won't change her mind about anything and that she is always the victim, never looking to improve but to pity herself. She said a couple other nasty things but there is no point to list them, it is irrelevant..

I could probably avoid conflict with her if I just never confronted her idiotic claims and her self pitying. I usually try to give her tough love and tell her my true opinion in the hope that she might consider it but it never seems to work sadly so maybe I should give up on this.

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I can't really speak about this to anybody so I figured I would ask your advice. I appreciate any opinions on the topic.