TL;DR Don't want to be forever alone, but statistically speaking, it is a much higher probability for me now that I'm HSV . What are your thoughts/experiences?

First off, I want to thank the people of this community and the many other positive, safe spaces on Reddit related to this sub. I've had a sense of not feeling alone and hope grow as a result, and it can be a lifesaver sometimes. I resonate with so much of what you all, my fellow HSV people, have spoken about.

I'm still early on in my process, I would say. I was diagnosed several months ago. I've struggled with so many aspects of living with this virus, but one that's been gnawing at me lately is the extreme reduction in possible partners for me.

I've always wanted to have a long-term life partner/wife. I am already not a 10/10 guy. Don't get me wrong, I believe I'm attractive and am a good guy, but I'm not in denial with how I compare to truly attractive dudes. I've always kinda struggled with a belief that the dating pool for me is significantly smaller than it is for a lot of men. I also have kinky interests and my sex life is a relatively high priority for me, or at least it was. And that reduced the dating pool more in the past.

Since testing positive I've had to reckon with the fact that yes, my possible partner pool is significantly smaller now, (more than the already small pool it was) and there's nothing I can do about it. I've had to accept that I most likely cannot prioritize my sex life as much as I used to in relationships, because doing so partially contributed to my infection, AND future relationships will likely not have nearly as much emphasis on sex. I've had to accept that I most likely cannot prioritize my kinky wishes/preferences for my sex life, because those who would get with me very likely may not be into that.

Basically, I was already probably too picky, and now can't afford to be. Finding a woman who is compatible with me personality-wise, attractiveness-wise, kinkiness-wise, AND is either HSV herself or willing to accept that in me seems fucking impossible. It seems like quite a small pond with not a lot of "the right" fish in it.

I admittedly don't want to sacrifice my preferences if I don't have to, but I also don't want to be an entitled or too picky person. Idk. Life is unfair and the world owes me nothing. I think I'll be ok with being alone for the rest of my life, but man, it sure would be nice if I didn't have to be...

Feel free to share about anything in this post that resonates with you; I'm always interested in hearing your perspectives. What was your experience with, and how did you cope with, the number of people who could be compatible with you being reduced DRASTICALLY essentially overnight?