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I’m in my early 20s making just under $170k TC in tech with 1 YOE. This is considered astronomical success in the circles I grew up in (lower middle class/public school/no name university). To the point I can’t really discuss finances with anyone IRL. With my upbringing I attach a significant amount of guilt to any expense I don’t perceive as frugal. Signing a lease on a $2k/mo apartment for my fiancé and I was really stressful to me because it feels like so much money walking out the door.
Visiting NYC this week and I’m blown away by what I see around me. I cannot wrap my head around how there are people not too much older than I am dropping nearly $10k monthly on an apartment in Hudson Yards. Is this just an upper echelon of society unaccessible to anyone not born into it? I’ve always thought I was pretty much maxing out what was possible for the opportunities I’ve been given. Building a future where that kind of lifestyle is even possible, much less reasonable, seems completely unattainable.
Do these people know something I don’t? Are they propping up an unsustainable lifestyle with debt, or sacrificing their retirement to fund luxury earlier on? How should I be framing this in a healthy way?
This resonates strongly with me.
I'm similar to you in that I spent time growing up in the lowest decile of family income, and now I'm in the top decile (top 2%). And the wealth above me was invisible growing up, but even now some of it blows my mind.
That said, I've come to realise - everyone is low in a one hierarchy or another, whether it's the lowest decile or having the shabbiest mansion in the street or last year's model G6. Top one hierarchy, and there's another one around the corner ready to disappoint you.
Be proud of the achievement you've made, and be grateful for life changing opportunities that many of your peers won't have. You've done amazing things and your high school mates back home would have their minds blown if they knew what you were up to know.
And don't worry about the trust fund babies, have fun creating your own legacy with your family in a way that aligns with your values and priorities.
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