Lowtuff has been charged with the following crimes by the decree of the King:

• 3 counts attempted grand larceny
• self abetting to steal accessories
• self accessory to abet larcenous cyber bullying
• Cultivation of Child Pornography
• Embezzlement
• Indecent exposure of disorderly accessories
• 5 counts Conspiracy to Collude with Grain Cartel
• White Fraud against Fellow White Man
• 80 counts MIP in Possession of Minors
• Perjury
• Racketeering
• Racket Ball with Apemen
• Pyramid Scheming
• Securities Fraud
• Securities Rape
• Sexual Rapal Assault with a Deadly Racket Ball Racket
• Shoplicitation
• Telemarketing Larceny
• 3 counts Vandalicious Intoxication
• Aggravated Open Container
• Stalking on Reddit
• Stalking on something that actually matters - not guilty
• Complaining about internet bullying
• Using Dove soap for Racial Hygiene
• 2 counts Grand Bestiality Auto
• Giving and Receiving without Court Order
• Evading an Officer in your Orphicers
• Corporal Punishment under assumed Daddy credentials
• Sucking off Welfare
• Union Conspiring
• Breaking Prop 36
• 56 counts Breaking GDAA (Grundeswald Defense Authorization Act) Laws 45 thru 865 (classified [ you have to be found guilty to figure out what the charges are])

You may now defend yourself.