I've been reminded in the last 24 hours that the hardest thing to go through as a dad is the inability to take away your child's pain especially when you're dealing with the same pain as them.

My daughter's robotics coach collapsed at the school right before lunch yesterday. The only good thing out of it was that it didn't happen during one of her classes with him. This man was not only her coach but a second dad to her and my best friend. I spent the rest of the day in the hospital with his wife who is also her band teacher. I was in the room with his wife every time the doctor came in with an update. They were transferring him to another hospital, so I headed there while they were getting him ready. On the way I got the call from his wife to let me know he had coded, and they couldn't revive him. My daughter was with me because I had picked her up from school before I headed out. I had to pull over in a parking lot and tell her that he didn't make it. I'll never forget the blood curdling NO scream from her.

Kept her home today, none of her teammates went to school either. I ended up taking her to lunch with some of them just to get them together and give them the chance to grieve with each other. I have absolutely no idea how to help her other than listen at this point. I don't have any advice, I haven't grieved properly in 23 years, due to the loss of a girlfriend when I was 20. I just bury it inside and don't deal with it. I could have easily become an alcoholic or harmed myself but thank God I got through that part of it ok. I know it's unhealthy but since then I've just lost the ability to properly deal with it. I just want to make sure she doesn't go down the same road as me. My wife isn't really in any position to give her advice either. She has her own issues dealing with grief and doesn't really process it any better than me, not to mention she was just as close to him as us so she's having to process it too.

Thoughts, prayers, good vibes whatever your thing is would be appreciated while I try to figure this out. She's lost a couple people in her life including a couple of grandpas, but even then, she's been closer to him than any of them. How do you tell a 15 year old it gets better or easier when you know damn well it doesn't? You just learn to live with it... or maybe that's just a consequence of the way I've went.