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An experienced dom's views (and observations) on submission from a spiritual perspective. Would likely be ignored but I felt I needed to share it.
If you've read my old posts/personals, you'd have noticed I talk a bit about 'submission and it's spiritual connotation'. I realized that most subs (or those wanting to be one) reply without understanding what that actually means.
I'll try and explain it with this post.
The idea comes from taking sex and kink beyond the body and mind. To the spirit. Yes, yes.. Stay with me despite the eye-roll.
At the first level, it is about that arousal you feel, and instead of feeling it just in your genitals like most of the doms have convinced you it is all about, that arousal begins seeping under your skin. Becoming that tingling sensation that takes over. Almost like the dom taking over your whole body (I hope you experience that some day. I've heard it's amazing).
And how do I make it work, you might wonder. That consistent sensation of feeling like you belong. It's ironic right? You belong to someone, yet within that belongingness you experience freedom. Liberation. To me it all comes down to keeping both the person and the kink together. It's all about the balance. I call it friendship with kink benefits. That is my mantra. I love balance. Like I mentioned in my old posts.. That sweet balance between sexual (body), sensual (heart) and sensible (mind). That balance between friendship and kink play. Between wholesome and hole-some. And of course, the balance between sexy and sincere. That's what I offer. And that's what I seek.
A lot of subs read that and doubt if this journey will be as sexually exciting as how they fantasize. And to them I usually say not to worry. I am gonna strip you naked of everything you've piled on yourself. All those barriers and shields and fences and self perceptions. I'll tear them apart. To leave you bare, raw, and naked. In all forms. Meeting your true self. That's why I call submission an exercise in spirituality. And it's erotic as fuck.
For me imagination is the key to the best kink experience. Turning on not just your body, but also your mind. And perhaps even more with the connection you share with the dom. Isn't that submission, too? Not because of the gear, the toys, the apparel but because of the imagination you share with your dom. Since this is online, it means combining your mind and mine. AND your body of course ;)
Think about that wanting for your master. That wanting him to want you to the point of using you for his pleasure. That's where I want to go. And it is possible if you do as you're told like a good sub. The best instruction to start with is by asking you to open your legs AND mind, for me. I don't do just one. It's always both.
Because when I enter your holes and head at the same time, you experience something else. Not just pleasure. It's like meeting yourself. With me taking away everything that you thought is you.
And that for me is the essence of SUBMISSION. Everything else to me is just porn filled fantasies.
Fun fact, I've never seen bdsm porn. Never been attracted to it. Yet always been attracted to domination. I work hard to understand each sub of mine and then push them beyond their limits. Always gently. Always firmly. And I know a lot of you are feeling this within yourself as you read. And you want to test and push your boundaries with me.
Because within boundaries is sex. Outside of them is freedom. How can one experience freedom within boundaries? And isn't submission more about freedom than anything else. Whether it's the 'straight' boys escaping the pressure of being the active participant in sex, or its anyone going through the daily stress to finally find a place to let go and forget everything else. Or just those that find inexplicable pleasure in serving. It is freedom that we seek after all.
Of course i dont mean crossing any limits we define beforehand. Those are never even in consideration when two people are intimate. That's just porn talk. P.s.- My limits are scat, blood, extreme pain, blackmail and exposure.
Usually when I talk about this, most subs get scared or intimidated. After all, they always believed submission is what they learned from porn or whatever reddit doms taught them. It's not a lot of effort actually. Its the same as seeking your true self.
See it this way: I tell you to find yourself. You walk the entire earth and reach at the same point after all the walking. Right where you started. And you tell me it was the toughest undertaking and you didn't find yourself. And then as a dom I tell you that instead of walking forward what if all you had to do was take a step back. Into yourself. That's where my pushing you (metaphorically) as a dom is all you need me for.
People might achieve it alone. But in the world of BDSM, someone had to guide you to see it. That's my role. That is all my role really.
We need to bring bdsm back to its basics. Beyond the overdose of kink porn and the ruthlessness now associated with it thanks to online doms. I hear about it everyday from the subs that apply. But if you think about it, nothing that I've shared here is anything but basic instinct.
My subs call it passion. But that's just me showing you what lies beneath your porn filled idea of bdsm. Bdsm at its core is a spiritual journey.
Ask any person on the spiritual journey. Whether with meditation or whatever else. It's the same idea. Ask experienced subs to define 'subspace'. Not much different from what meditators are trying to achieve, but usually by themselves. That state where you cease to exist as is. You see who you truly are. You go with the flow.
And that's why only the subs who know it and seek it worship their doms. They know how important the dom then is on their journeys. And the dom isn't about just the kinks. He's about helping you achieve that state. Helping you enable it. And once you recognize it, that's when you surrender.
Peace. And hope you find the dom you desire. And deserve.
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