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Hi everyone,
I wanted to ask for some feedback on this script of mine. I'm a slut for these kinds of cliched tropes, so I wanted to write something about the slight obsession with the whole drinking enough water thing.
I'm open to all the feedback regarding everything (I'm quite new to writing scripts like this), but specifically interested in what you guys think of the PIV scene from line 177 on. I feel like it's to short, but I also don't know what to do about it or how to make it longer without making it redundant.
A short summary: Your boyfriend and Dom finds out you didn't drink enough water today. After spanking you to make you learn your lesson, he decides to make you thirsty with strenuous sex.
Here's the link: Script on scriptbin
(Posted an updated version: Link)
Thank you in advance for the help!
-Ans
Subreddit
Post Details
- Posted
- 2 years ago
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- View post on reddit.com
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- reddit.com/r/GWAScriptGu...