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Happy Hanukkah and Shabbat Shalom! My second piece is out!
A transcript of a voicemail that, if you squint hard enough, is actually sweet. You see, these two assholes at Big Box Corporation have been fired for sexual harassment after creating a Fuckable List of women at the office. On the end of the list is, well, you, with the little note - "only if she lost 50 pounds!" How clever these men are. Well, they are so clever they accidentally sent it to the entire team, and now they're fired and you're on a free time off -- no need to take PTO! But now your tipsy work buddy is leaving you a rambling message telling you to... get a therapist, and also he loves you.
Get a therapist. I love you.
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- 11 months ago
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