Hey all! I was at work a few days ago, and it was INCREDIBLY slow in my department so I decided I wanted to write something. I didn't know what it would be, but I'd been in LOVE with the musical adaptation of Beetlejuice lately, so I think that probably wormed its way out from my subconscious.

And I ended up writing this parody of The Whole "Being Dead" Thing from the musical. Making an appearance by name are u/ivy_wildeva and u/heartdamage (don'[t worry, I got their permission to use their names, haha), and all vocals are performed by me.

Here's the lyrics if you wanna follow along.

Hey folks!

Pardon me, make way…

-ahem-

WELCOME TO GWA!!!

Now, let's skip the scripts and start on the whole...y'know…

"Being hot" thing.

You're here

Because you're horny

Normal porn won't work

It's boring!

So you came to hear us moaning and…

Let's be honest...The whole "being hot" thing!

Sex can make you pretty wet…

"But voices? Man, they're freaking great"

"I need my toys, I just can't wait!"

I can show you what CUMS next

So have a seat

Pull up a chair

We'll make you cum, and we're not even there

So just relax!

Don't be coy

Grab your headphones and a toy

And just press play!

-moan-

WELCOME TO GWA!

You’re...You’re gonna feel good

Like I knew you would…

MOAN! YOU’RE ALL GONNA MOAN!

YOU”RE ALL GONNA MOAN!

Oh....Are you ready to blow?

We’re sexy and we know…

In case you didn’t know, this is erotic audio!

Everybody can make you edge

Like IvyWilde or heartdamage

The women VA’s? They’re top notch talent!

Just go check ‘em out!

The whole “being hot” thing!

You’re just gonna LOVE the posts here

Yeah, even the blokes can get your goat here

And every post? It could get a TON of upvotes

The whole...whoa...900? THE WHOLE “BEING HOT” THING!

Nobody can hold it in!

“Oh my god, I just came!”

Buddy, that is FREAKING great!

You can bust a nut or two

‘Cause every day is Christmas

And you don’t wanna miss this

And if they say they’re British?

Hey, I’d probably click it…

The audios are priceless

The actors are the nicest

The mods are just the finest

GWA, go find it!

r/gonewildaudio! There you go!

Welcome to GWA!

You’re...You’re gonna feel good

Like I knew you would…

How you doin’? -moan-

That’s good! Ba da ba de be ba de ba bow!

Oh....Are you ready to blow?

We’re sexy and we know…

In case you didn’t know, this is erotic audi--

OH! Now you know

If you go, you’ll likely blow

But also have to understand that “No”

Really means “No,” dude.

If you send a performer a creepy DM, you’re are on the WRONG path...

There’s no room, for debate

Yes, you came to masturbate

But the reason that the audios are made

Is not to invite you..,.

That’s the thing with this!

You don’t have to be a creep!

So, go and give that link a click!

“Holy hell, this voice is dreamy!”

“Oh my god, this scene is STEAMY!”

When you’re horny, this is it!

“This beats porn, I’m super creamy!”

I really hope nobody sees me…

From the dawn of all creation

Sex was there, and so was masturbation

We have mastered the art

Of erotic audio art

So how ‘bout we all make a start

On the whole…”Being hot” thing

GOD, I hope you’re ready for GWA!

I REALLY hope you guys enjoy listening to this as much as I enjoyed writing and recording it. It was SO much fun.

Sincerely,

Him