I've been posting and replying intermittently to Reddit personals for over a decade now, as a solo man in an open relationship, as a MF couple in an open relationship, and as a single man. I've posted looking for friendship, casual sex, medium/long term partners, and about exploring new or niche fantasies and kinks.

I've sent a lot of messages. Some of them admittedly (often through the fug of excitement) not as good as others. I've also received a lot too. Some of these messages go on to online fun, some to meeting up. Some of them have even become really long term friends I still see after years. Here's what I've learnt/feel some of the men are missing on GBr4r. It's not relationship advice at all, it's more about ways to deal with the nuances of messaging people from reddit:

You're not for everyone, and everyone isn't for you

Lots of men approach online dating and GBr4r with the scattergun approach. They feel like it's a numbers game and if they assault enough people with low effort replies then eventually they'll find someone. Realistically, this doesn't work. You might occasionally find someone with low enough standards or self-esteem to reply to your 'hey' but then the chances of them actually being what you're looking for and vise-versa is ASTRONOMICALLY low. You're better off finding your niche, what really attracts you, what you really want, and really putting some effort in. In the 20 minutes it takes you to fire off 50 'Sup?'s to every F4M you see instead find the one that really speaks to you, that is looking for someone like you, and spend 10 minutes writing a really good message.

Paragraphs work, detail is delightful

If you're messaging someone who has put even a small amount of effort into their post then there is nothing more off-putting for them then a single reply of 'Hey, I'm what you're looking for' with no explanation or follow-up. If someone says they're looking for someone over 5'8 then mention you're 5'9. If they say they're looking for someone fit then tell them how you love rock climbing (seriously why does everyone I fancy go rock climbing. I really need to take up rock climbing..). If they mention being nerdy then talk about how you play D&D. I recently posted looking for someone to indulge a friend of mine in an MF 1 threesome and the male replies were SO varied. They guy we both really liked wasn't strictly the most handsome, he certainly didn't have the biggest cock (he specifically mentioned its averageness..) but he was by FAR and away the most interesting and easy to talk to. His initial reply was well written, polite, addressed everything I'd mentioned in the post, and offered up some extra tasty little bits. Perfect. That man put in like 5 minutes of effort and, assuming we all get on when we meet up for drinks, he's going to fuck my absolutely gorgeous friend. Weirdly the female replies were similar, although with an admittedly smaller sample size. A few other replies however were from what I strongly suspect was men posing as women, which leads me nicely on to:

Don't be offended by people asking you to verify, and don't be afraid to ask

Their post seems too good to be true, you've traded pics and they're outrageously hot... You're a little skeptical it's not just a photo stolen from someone's instagram. Get them to verify. It's 2022. Taking a picture on your phone is easy. Sending it via something relatively anonymous like reddit chat is easy. There's nothing that says it has to be saucy, there's nothing that says it even has to be your whole face, just something to prove you're the 18/f/cali you say you are. Ask someone to throw up a peace sign, or bite their finger for a photo. Even a voice note helps confirm some degree of it. The moment someone is at all evasive about providing verification you can almost guarantee it's a wind-up.

TL;DR: Put some effort in. Communicate better. Be honest and expect honesty.