Hello London, let’s see how this turns out.

Firstly, I’m definitely not looking for anything serious - maybe more along the lines of a FWB situation. The sad reality is that my husband has decided to discard me like the rubbish and we will be getting a divorce. This is where I hope someone could help temporarily distract me from my bleak reality and just help me remember what it feels like to be wanted and desired as a woman every so often - yes, lads, it really has been that long for me. Ideally, I’d like to start things off online or text to get to know one another and eventually if things are right then we could meet up for a drink and see how things go. I can’t host but willing to travel.

A bit about me: 36, American expat, Asian descent, curvy body (regularly working out to be fitter and a little less squidgy), petite (1.52 or 5’0”), professional working 9-5 grind, pierced nipples, DDF. I love history, going to museums, exploring different places, and watching Formula 1 on the weekends. I also love to read, cook, watching movies or just have a cosy night in with my dog. I can be shy to start but once comfortable I’m easygoing, funny, witty, sweet, saucy after a few drinks or a couple of joints, and game for any adventure. Sexually, I have a submissive streak, have a praise kink, love it when it gets rough but still want it to be sensual. Willing to try new things as well - I’ve always fantasised about being touched and getting off somewhere public.

You: I’m looking for someone confident, laidback, funny, adventurous, maybe a bit wild and spontaneous, and well-rounded so able to hold a nonsexual conversation as well. My type tends to be tall and broad - basically if you’re built like a rugby player, I’m on board. Bonus if you’ve got a dominant streak and a big cock!

If all that waffle sounds good to you, send me a message and a photo of yourself (no dick pics to start please). I’m happy to send photos back to verify. Thanks for listening to my TED talk.