Hey there fellow Redditors. This is probably the last place I should come to seeking a serious long term relationship, but Tinder, Bumble, Hinge et al. have failed me so far. I've made some okay connections on those apps, and had some pleasant dates, but I just can't seem to find the right combination of what I'm looking for in a partner. Unfortunately, I'm coming to think that that combination might not actually exist!
A bit about me: I'm early 40s, in pretty decent shape (I exercise regularly, running, cycling, football, etc.), 5'11'', brown hair, blue eyes. I'm educated and have good qualifications, I have a good job (though I'm looking to take some time out from it soon and eventually move into a new and more fulfilling career pathway). I'd consider myself emotionally intelligent (having been in therapy for the last couple of years). I'm funny and charming (though obviously not humble). I've been on a spiritual journey of late (mindfulness, meditation, Buddhism), and I have loads of other interests and hobbies: I love music of many different genres, from 50s and 60s jazz, to Laurel Canyon folk, to old school hip hop, to contemporary metal (and lots in between); I'm a big fan of film (I love world cinema, indie films, cult films, horror); I watch copious amounts of TV (prefer "realist" stuff like The Wire); I love the outdoors: nature, botanical gardens, hiking, etc. I enjoy art (making and viewing!) And I obviously enjoy compiling long lists about myself...
A bit about you: First and foremost, I'm looking for someone "authentic". I think that's the best way to describe it. Basically, someone who is happy in their own skin and doesn't feel the need to people please, and who isn't materialistic. Perhaps someone who, like me, is also on their own spiritual journey. I'm a sapiophile, so intelligence (of whatever variety) is a plus. Physical attraction and chemistry is also important for me, but luckily I'm attracted to a wide range of types: from the curvy and voluptuous, to the more petite and slight framed (and everything in between). I'd say that I'm more into the "alt" or "indie" look above anything else, but that's not necessarily a dealbreaker. I'm also flexible on age but would prefer someone closer to my own age (maybe 5-10 years either way?) I tend to go for brunettes or redheads, but beggars can't be choosers! It's also important to me that a potential partner is kink friendly. In fact, this is very important. I spent 15 or so years in a very vanilla marriage which was deeply unfulfilling. I have a range of kinks, but rather than list them here (where's the fun in that?), I think it would be nice to gradually reveal these to you over time (and vice versa). Finally, it would be nice if we had some stuff in common, some mutual ground, whether that's film, TV, music, nature, art, philosophy, spirituality, etc. Again, this is something that we would hopefully discover in time.
So yeah, I hope I'm not asking for too much! I'm just really keen to meet someone that makes my heart race, who makes me feel alive, and who I can grow old with x
Don't all DM me at once!