So I'm 46F and hadn't had any good friends for a long time - I'm definitely an introvert, though. I had a bad rejection experience a few years ago and ended up talking to some people I knew about wanting to make good friends. One of the ladies was open to meeting up with me more, so we've been doing that for a couple of years or so.

She's nice but - like me - not super outgoing. I love her but I think I've kind of chosen to because it's nice loving someone and enjoying thinking of them. I've enjoyed getting her nice presents for her birthday and Christmas (she forgot my birthday this year though 🙃).

At the moment with our schedules we go for about a 20-minute walk together most weeks. I haven't really been liking it much though - I feel this anxiety about saying things that are interesting enough or something, and feel awkward talking about problems.

It's as if we're (although I can't really speak for her) conscious of doing the things we're supposed to do as friends, instead of it being natural - it probably doesn't help that we became more involved friends because I said I wanted to make close friends 🙃

I enjoy talking to really outgoing people because they talk a lot and ask questions as if they're interested - I feel then as if I'm just helping a bit to build a really nice thing, instead of us each having just a few thin sticks to try to build with 🤷 However, I meet very few really outgoing people.

My question is, is this normal for introverts, that I want to be close to someone but usually I'd rather be doing something interesting on my own than trying to talk to someone? 🫤