I'm about to turn 30 and I haven't dated anyone. Lately, about a year ago, I started listening to audiobooks and discovered the world of dark romance.

The thing is, I grew up on gothic literature, music and horror, so I've always had an attraction for dark things, although I consider myself a pretty positive person, given all the circumstances in the world and life. Recently I decided that I need to feel like the main character of my life and, perhaps, of the books I read. As they say, you need to try everything in life, so that you don’t regret the missed opportunities later.

And here I am, trying another thing within the limits of the law and rules. I have always been able to clearly separate fiction and reality, chose villains as my favorite characters and followed the rules and moral principles, etiquette in reality, because films/TV series/books should not influence your perception of reality and your values.

I always chose with my mind, not my heart, and I didn't understand how girls could fall in love with men so easily and quickly, but..... I also want to feel at least something.

But I don't know where to start, where to look for them. I don't use dating apps, online communication is enough for me, because I have big insecurities about my appearance and trust issues. So what should I do? I want to try and let go, just for fun but also I want at least some attention