I figured why not just list all of the bad shit about me? Ya know, get it right there out in the open. Let you make judgements for yourself and all that. This may be an awful idea, but here goes. (You can also just skip the self deprecating section).

What I Hate About Myself:

I have reaaally horrible anxiety, but very recently started medication for it. I also have really bad social anxiety. If you agree to talk to me, I will often ask you to call me out of nowhere for 10-15 minutes while I'm at the store because my social anxiety is getting to my head too much. My social anxiety also means I'm practically incapable of making real friends, and dating apps are just a full on no. I'm MUCH more outgoing online with strangers than I am with anyone else, so my social circle is tiny.

I'm super self-deprecating. That comes from a mixture of abusive exes in the past and a confusing, mostly emotionally abusive yet supportive family?

I'm needy and clingy and I crave constant, regular validation. Often, I require the same validation to be said over and over. I struggle a lot to trust what others say, especially about me. Like I refuse to believe people enjoy my company or like me or whatever. I will constantly tell you you don't mean it if I feel like you don't.

I will want to watch movies or play games or do THINGS together all the time. I will want to voice call OBSESSIVELY, much more than you'll probably want.

I'm also not very attractive, sorry. I'm also missing a front tooth temporarily. -_- Root canal unfortunately snapped at the base and I can't afford to fix it.

Please Don't Tell Me To Not Be Hard On Myself:

I'm not listing all of this to gain sympathy or anything. I just... I have a lot of issues with friends or people I'm close to finding out these problems and suddenly no longer thinking I'm worth the work. And I don't blame them? I'm a lot to deal with. I know that. I'm not being hard on myself or down about myself, I'm just being really honest and blunt about a lot of my flaws.

However, these aren't me 90% of the time. Most of the time, I'm fun (I've been told?) and patient and empathetic. But when these issues surface, I'm not that easy to deal with and I apologize in advance for it. But if you can just stick with it and stick with me, I'll get better. The more patient you're able to be, the better I'll be able to trust you and deal with these issues before they're issues.

The More Fun Stuff!

I'd love to meet someone willing to put up with me so we can voice chat, watch movies (horror is my favorite and bad rom coms), play games maybe. For compatibility's sake, here's some random interests of mine! Maybe we'll have some overlap:

• Crocheting
• Houseplants and I'm going to TRY to start a small garden this year
• Video Games and Board Games (about to get back into Animal Crossing New Leaf)
• Working Out? Kinda? Sorta? Don't get me wrong, I'm fat (working on it), but recently discovered VR fitness and I love it
• Podcasts
• All things spooky - horror movies, podcasts, etc
• Digimon and Pokemon

So if you're willing to take a chance on me, that'd be pretty swell.

Thanks for reading. (Also I cannot believe how long this was, sorry!)