I'm asking advice on how to relate a partner's fence sitting with another partner when our interests may not align.

The relationship type might not be the most common, so I'll try to explain the situation as simply as I can. Feel free to ask for clarification.

• I've been a sexual/romantic partner to a woman, let's call her Ada, for around a year, but we have been friends many years prior to that. We both live alone. Based on our conversations on this topic, her stance on having kids has always been "probably not", trending towards "no" during the past few years, but is not set in stone.

• Also around a year ago. Ada became involved with another person, Bea, and their relationship has progressed in a fairly escalator-like fashion since. They are very obviously in love, and that's great.

• I don't know Bea super well, but apparently her stance on kids is close to "probably yes", and this has sparked some serious self-reflection on Ada's part, as she is very invested in this relationship.

• You see, both Ada and Bea would like to move in together soon, and that would make sense for them both logistically and in terms of their relationship goals. But they both agree that advancing the relationship to that point might be risky if they are not sure about having kids. Bea is older and more experienced than Ada, has more practical reasons for moving in together, and is more eager to resolve this issue soon rather than wait and maintain the status quo for months or years.

• I do not want children and do not want to have a relationship with someone who has children. If Ada decided to have children together with Bea, that choice would almost certainly mean that our relationship would end, and knowing how difficult it is to maintain friendships with parents, I don't have high expectations for that aspect to remain strong, either.

It pains me to see a person I love struggle with this, and I would like to help. She has asked me for help, but I am hesitant to tell her what she should do with someone else. Staying completely out would feel wrong, too, as she is my partner, too.

I do not see Ada doing very well as a parent, for various reasons, and in the past she has thought so, too. There are many reasons why I would very much prefer she didn't have children. But obviously I cannot escape my own biases or the glaring conflict of interest.

How can one navigate a situation like this with honesty and compassion, working inside one's own boundaries and being a good advocate for both your partner and yourself?