I'm sorry if this won't make complete sense I'm just trying to get my thoughts and feels down and out there. So the main theme of my problem/s is not so much as I'm a virgin wanting kink, it's more of the fact I'm starting to thinking of my virginity as it's own kink and I don't know if it's a good thing or bad or maybe both?

My idea/fantasy is that I'm in chastity as a virgin and would be dom/me/top holds the key/my virginity and choose when I can lose it. While most of me loves the idea, part of me is thinking this is really dumb of me and thinking that I'm setting the bar for what I want super high where only world record pole vaulters can get over it.

I know like it's okay to know what you want, but I feel like this maybe to much. I don't want this to be a hang up that causes stuff. I don't know I just have mixed feels about this and wanted to talk with people about it. So am I a dummy? Thanks for reading :).