Hi, over the last 12 months I’ve tried to find an online femdom dynamic. And on a few occasions I have connected with someone where it looked like we could have a lot of fun. BUT, I found out I have an issue in my mind, I suppose.

I want to build up a good connection with the person and also slowly get sexual. The building up a connection part goes fine, but once things get sexual, I cant handle it despite really wanting it.

What happens to me is that I get extremely nervous - my heart starts pounding. My stomach gets tight, its like some imaginary hand just squeezed it. I get short on breath. It’s like Im having a panic attack.

For a day or two I manage, but then I just cant go on.

If there is a therapist or someone that knows about psychology. Can you please tell me what’s wrong with my mind?

• this happens only when Im submissive and my kinks are involved
• in a past (irl) relationship I did plenty of bdsm (mostly sub) and it was fine

Im totally open to just being a neurotic person… but how do I fix this?