Hello!

I’m looking for advice on how to find a real relationship that has a femdom aspect. And by that, I mean that I want the normal parts of a relationship with someone where the sexual parts are more along the femdom lines.

So just a bit of a backstory… I’ve made a few posts on some of the personals subreddits but those didn’t really turn into anything. A lot of the time, the people I talked to were either catfish or I don’t know… they didn’t seem to like to talk about things outside of kinks or sexual topics. And maybe that’s my fault? I don’t know if that’s how my posts come off? I have talked to a few real women & made friendships but things just didn’t work out to be more than that.

I’ve also done research or looked at what people have suggested in the past and two of the suggestions I’ve seen were “try Fetlife” and “go to munch events in person”. And I just wanted to bring those up because any tips simply suggesting to do either of those aren’t super beneficial to me and I can explain why.

So, with Fetlife… I did create an account but I don’t even know what I’m supposed to do from there. I don’t mean that literally, but it feels like there’s so much going on with Fetlife that it’s super overwhelming and honestly seems too wild for me.

And I do think going to events in person would be beneficial for sure. But, I wouldn’t go to a “normal” party where I didn’t know anyone there let alone a kinky one. So I honestly don’t even know how to navigate that. Also, for the munch events I have seen, they weren’t really for people in my age group.

So, yeah, the point of me saying all that wasn’t to say that I wouldn’t do any of these things or that those are bad suggestions. The point is that I kind of need more than something surface level. Instead of just “write better posts” I want to know how or what I’m doing wrong. Instead of “just go to a munch event” I’d wanna know more about what they’re like or how other people have overcome similar fears of going to them.

I hope this post doesn’t come off as super arrogant or as if I’m saying I want something but don’t want to put in effort towards it. But if it does, let me know. I’d appreciate any criticism, suggestions, feedback, etc. honestly.

Thanks!