(This turned out to be a pretty long post, but IMO a decent one, so take your time to read through it carefull!)

Hello, it's me again!

Yesterday I've made a post about how to increase your chances of meeting someone interested in femdom.
Here's the link to it: https://www.reddit.com/r/FemdomCommunity/comments/102kp10/general_rules_to_increase_your_success_rate/

I highly recommend you check it out as it was received very well and a bunch of people commented to share their input. Make sure to check it out if you're still looking for that ideal (play-)partner!

I was asked to write a second part about how to increase your success rate in getting your gf/wife into taking a more dominant role. This is meant as beavioral tips and not as an "A-Z guide how to get a FLR", so don't expect me to tell you to do XYZ.
In my post from yesterday I mentioned that in 95/100 cases it's the male subs mistakes are the primary reason for him not finding a femdom relationship. For an already existing relationship I think that this is partly still the case, but the reasons for it are very different. So don't think that "my wife just isn't dominant" and shrug it off as incompatibility. That could very well be the case, but most likely it's just how you present femdom to her that "scares" her off.

I digress, here are a couple of behavioral tips I recommend you do to increase your chances at getting your wife to dominate you.

! DISCLAIMER BEFORE YOU CONTINUE READING: !
I know that some people like certain stuff and some people like other stuff. I don't want you to "force/coerce/gaslight" your gf/wife into being more dominant. This is NOT the intention of this post.
The intention is to open up the gates of femdom to your partner. It sounds very simple, but here's where most of you fuck up. It's not that most women don't like being dominant in one way or the other, but that they're introduced to it in a most likely fucked up way, which scares them and makes them want nothing to do with it.
I don't want this to be a generalization, as there's women who just don't like femdom, or women who are naturally more dominant etc. Also, there's no way for me to know wich of these groups your particular partner belongs to. So keep that in mind when you continue reading. Lets get to it.

1. Communication:
   You've all heard it, and you all know it. And I still feel the need to make sure to always mention it, again and again. Communication will not only be the most important part for your success at the beginning of your journey, but all the way through it. You're both adults (I assume, if not you should not be on this subreddit anyway LOL), so you should act like that and talk about your thoughts and feelings. If you've never done that, this might feel a little weird at first, but trust me, it's very important and you'll both feel better and safer after each time talking about stuff.
2. HOW you communicate things is KEY:
   In addition to the previous point, HOW you actually bring across your points is just as important as actually talking. Saying stuff like "You're just lazy and not doing this and that!" will always be counterproductive and hurt your relationship more than it helps.
   Think about what point you want to bring across and formulate some key notes beforehand. There's no shame in preparing for something as important as this in advance to gather your thoughts and talk things through slowly without missing key stuff.
   Now as for the HOW, I think it's easier to show you a bad example and a good one, with both actually wanting the same exact thing, which is getting locked up in chastity more (just as an example).
   BAD:
   "You don't lock me in chastity enough!"
   GOOD:
   "Do you remember the last time we've had sex after you've locked me up for 3/4/5 days beforehand? For me it actually wasn't about the sex and the release, but serving you sexually (or any other way) beforehand. Seeing you take control was so sexy and turned me on a lot! I would love if we could incorporate this kind of play more in our future play and I would love to hear how you've felt during this time."
   Do you see how much more likely she is to actually understand what you mean with the "good" paragraph? Not only her understanding you better, but this doesn't read like straight up blaming her. Rather it's you telling her about your emotions, how it made you feel and WHY you liked it. Most women love to please their man and are not used to the fact that the pleasure of a man can be tied to denial or service. This is the mental barrier that you have to break. And formulating things smart is a perfect way to do that. Also, remember to always stay calm and collected and to never blame her, but to rather understand her point of view.
3. Start slow and don't push her:
   You have to start somewhere and have to jump over your own shadow to initiate the topic of femdom to her some way or another, because if you don't you'll most likely be stuck where you're at right now and things won't magically come to you.
   Now I would advise you to take things VERY slowly. Probably much slower than you're thinking right now.
   Femdom might be something very casual to you, but the chances are very high that they aren't for your gf/wife. So make sure to not open up your first conversation with stuff like "I want you to wear latex and peg me", because that will nope her the fuck out. This is another instance of what not to do, even if it's your most favorite porn to jerk off to or the ideal realtionship in your opinion.
   It's hard to give some general advice here, because every person and relationship is different. Some women would immediately be down to watch some femdom porn with you to learn about it (DISCLAIMER: If that's the case for you, don't open some hardcore shit right away. Maybe some light femdom bondage with a tie or w/e), others might like to read about it and initially figure it out alone. You have to find the point of interest for your wife and make femdom "tasty" for her and not something that's full of whips, dungeons and even more initially daunting things.
4. Small steps can go a long way/ it's a learning process:
   Don't expect to have your gf/wife be YOUR dream femdom within a week/month or even year. This is a learning process for both of you, for her to find her groove and her likes/dislikes and for you to most certainly lower your expectations.
   You have to imagine how you've felt when you've first discovered porn or femdom porn, and that's probably how your gf/wife feels like. It's a big world and it should be your job to help her find her pace within it.
   Don't make this mistake of trying to berate her into being how you expect her to be. If she finds interest in something, don't talk her out of it just because you want her to get into another topic first or w/e different reason you have. Let her make discoveries and more importantly mistakes and talk about them. One example I have is that if she agrees to lock you up for a week (in a hypothetical scenario), but doesn't tease you as much as you'd like, don't throw stuff at her head like a dickhead. You either talk about it within the week as calmly and non-accusatory as possible, or you man through and wait out the week and talk about if afterwards, when the play ends.
   There's a chance that if you both grow and learn for a certain period of time, that there'll be like a shifting moment for her, where you'll feel like "woah, she's turned it up a notch or 10". This is the moment where you both reap the rewards of working on your relationship and trusting each other, with the reward being an exciting sex life you both hopefully enjoy.
5. Don't beg for solutions on Reddit:
   A common mistake submissive men make is to go on many different subreddits and ask for solutions they can just copy paste into their life and make it magically work within a couple of days. Let me tell you that there's no chance of that happening, except for maybe visiting a pro Domme who can fulfill your fantasies.
   Reddit may help you get some ideas (the search function is a very underated tool may I say!), but not a single soul on here can help you with your individual relationship.
   As I've mentioned above and in my previos post, it's very likely that YOU'RE the biggest reason you don't get what you want, so try to gather as much info as you can, browse through multiple websites AND REFLECT (!) the points that apply to you. This is a long as process, so you should treat it as such.
6. Make the barrier of entry as easy as possible for her:
   If there's anything you can do to make discovering things as easy as possible for your partner, DO IT!
   The easiest example I could come up with is do the damn research for your partner. If she has no idea if there are any books on the topic she wants to dive further in, that's your cue to hop on your pc and research it. And don't forget to compare reviews etc., because you definitely don't want to get this wrong.
   After you've done that, you DON'T go back to her and say "there's a book called ABC by XYZ which is what you're looking for", but rather go out of your way to look for a retailer who sells the book and buy it. That is the least you can do for her and, again, removes one barrier of entry for her.
7. Once you're in, you're IN:
   With the above I mean that you yourself should be very sure you want to go this route with your partner. Choosing this way of life could result in parts of your own life revolving around your partner from now on (even if it's only her satisfaction > your satisfcation). That's the life of a submissive in a femdom relationship.
   Don't have your partner go through all of this and then just ditch it first second after you don't get the results you expect. It's a whole new journey for her, so don't forget that. It is a lot of work for both of you, but the reward at the end is that much sweeter.
   Also, if she lets you cum on her foot and tells you to lick it all up like a good boy while that post nut clarity of yours starts to kick back in, you're gonna have to slurp it up anyway. Don't do all of this just because you're horny and turn into a different person after you cum. It gets less worse after each time, I promise ;)
   On another note: don't give up! Even if there are setbacks, be reassured that if it works, it will all be worth it in the end and you'll both grow as persons and more importantly, as lovers.
8. Sad chance that you're incompatible:
   If after everything you've tried (with the tips above in mind) your partner still shows 0% interest into dominating you in one way or another, there's a high chance that you both are just incompatible. Here is where there's a junction on the road for you.
   You either stay on the lane you're currently on and have to live with the fact that your wife won't be able to satisfy the femdom kink of yours. You have to make the decision if you can live with that or not.
   If you can't, then you can either have a talk with your partner to open up the relationship (for one or both partners), so you can get that satisfaction from another partner or pro Domme, or you split up. This might be a hard decision to make, but there's not a lot of reasons on this planet to live an unfulfilled life. And if you're truly unfulfilled in that regard (and not just horny for femdom sex), then you have not much to loose imo.

I hope this thread helps you wiggle your way through introducing femdom to your partner the right way! Again, if anyone would like to add something, feel free to do so in the comments!

Thank you for reading!