They’re even less here in New Zealand. Most ive seen or spoken to are very brutal, almost hateful towards me. And because of my size and appearance, they see me as a challenge, not someone to be taken care of which makes me break out immediately - since femdom isnt natural to me. Im only curious and i dont want a poor introduction.

Munches and Fetlife are dead in my area. People that attend munches are the typical old dudes who have unresolved ‘cases’ against them. You are whom you associate with so i cut that part out. Fetlife on its own is amazing for chatting but no one is looking to meet, and i didnt even mention sexual, just trying to gauge how to approach this new world.

I suppose i am trying too hard. Constantly posting on reddit isnt obviously going to lead to a healthy headspace but im all out of options. My encounters are always stringless or being put as a ‘backup’ which honestly levels my self-value. Not quite there. Not quite enough.

And i really want to explore the non-sexual aspect. The female led relationship or role reversal. Being held and being prepared lovingly, spoken to not spoken about.

Am i asking for too much if i am asking for anything at all?