I see a lot of posts about whether and how to deny. I see relatively few about the reasoning behind the decision. hopefully this type of discussion is encouraged.

I’ve had a number of ds-oriented relationships, and orgasm control and denial play an important role in each. You might say they’re the foundation of a ds relationship.

The obvious reasons are that orgasm denial makes a girl more sexual and a bit frenzied. It reduces her to a more animalistic version of herself. Interestingly, orgasm denial affects girls differently. Some become more feminine and submissive. Some become more bratty and irritable. It’s incredible to see the degree to which a girls pussy controls her mood, her personality, and her desire to please. This sticky little hole between her legs has such a hold on her that I often tell a girl she’s not submissive to me, but to her own pussy. That’s always a fun conversation and realization.

I enjoy the stages of denial as well. The initial confidence. The jokes and assertions that she’ll be fine. The hesitant realization that she’s in over her head. The meek suggestion that it’s been long enough. The requests that evolve to demands and then crumble to begging. Her offering things, bargaining with acts she’d previously refused and disdained. Begging to debase and demean herself to satisfy that sticky, insistent little hole. Teasing her, physically and verbally, as she shakes and jumps toward my hands and my requests.

More so than the results, I love what orgasm denial represents. Orgasms, and the ability to rub her pussy at will, are things a girl takes for granted from childhood. Those first feelings and the discovery of self pleasure are fundamental aspects of someone’s sexuality. It’s an intimate and personal act. To give it to another is both a true act of submission and a privilege for the Dom to whom it’s offered. That gift is always a beautiful act and one I appreciate.

What are your reasons for seeking or offering denial?