after lots of advice, much deliberation, and even more edging, i decided to end my denial streak that stood at 103 days. this is the longest i have ever been denied - last year i went a full three months without an orgasm.

it was fun at first! all that pent-up energy with nowhere to go. a week or so ago, denial started to feel more like a chore, so i decided to have an orgasm or five as something of a reset button. there were a few reasons as to why, but the main thing was to give myself a fresh starting point.

i feel incredible. my body is still humming with energy, and my limbs still are a little jelly-like after my little treat to myself.

i started out a little easy - the goal was to edge 5 times before i had an orgasm so i could make it to 400 edges total. i started with just a wand on my clit, then i added one of my bigger dildos. i switched to my rabbit vibe after that. when i tell you it was a shrieking, screaming orgasm - ohmygod. it felt so good.

i think for the next little while i'm going to be sticking to shorter stints of denial. an orgasm after 100 edges, or go for a week without coming. something to look forward to, y'know? something achievable. rest assured, the ratio of edges to orgasms will always remain heavily skewed to the former.

and, if you want to listen to those final five edges and first orgasm i've had in months, it's here 💕