Idk what's wrong with me. I feared my pastor growing up as a kid and ultimately respected him. I feel like I was brainwashed. My mother definitely has a two faced personality. I feel so conflicted. Turns out I might be gay idk. Knowing if my mom found out about that she would kill me not literally. Was a case of domestic violence between my then step dad and my mother (her the victim) the church swept it under the rug in a sense. He hurt me mother and then called my sister a sl3t (she was probably 13 or 12) and me he started really hate me. Knowing how they did that. I just want to run away inro the wood and go no contact with everyone.