My pastor (my dad) wants to take me to go to a youth service tomorrow night. But since I’ve been deconstructing, I’ve been trying to not go to a lot of services and I haven’t gone to one in almost three months. I got hired for my job but I don’t have any shifts yet because they’re having issues with onboarding new employees through their new program.

I’d love to stay home and just have the quiet to myself, even though it’s not the same as having my own apartment or something. But I can’t think of anything, I know I’m 20 and an adult, but he has way more leverage over me. Plus it could raise questions about if I really believe this religion (I don’t) and if I crack, it probably wouldn’t end well.

Any ideas on what I can come up with as an excuse? I hate that I have to deal with this but I realize I’ll need to put my foot down if I’m going to leave soon. Anything helps.