Been 10 years, was supposed to be 11 in December. However, life didn't turn out to be the way I thought it would be. It's been a long distance relationship for the past 2 years.

Rewind to a few months, she told me she found someone with potential. A sign I ignored because feelings is something I believe one can't control. I was making plans to meet her and called her up one day only for her to say that she kissed the guy. Shattered and not knowing what to do, I immediately blocked her for 2 weeks. Called her up straight from the airport to tell her that I'm on my way and I need to see her. She made it to my my place (her bags were packed with clothes for 2 days, she had plans of a stay over with her friend where the guy would drop by as well) and I told her it was okay and we'll sort things out. To my surprise, she didn't want to go on, her reasons being we are different people, wanting different things in life and haven't been compatible. It was the end. I'm back home now pondering if that was just a reason or if she's monkey branching and just needed a reason.

I've gone no contact on her but it's killing me. I did break it when she called me the other day only to tell her that it was her decision and that I was just abiding by it.

She wants to stay in touch and doesn't want to forgo the friendship. I just haven't been able to accept the fact that she doesn't want to have a romantic relationship anymore. I've been receiving her texts from time to time telling me that she's hurt me and that she wants to chose another path. I haven't responded nor do I know what to respond. I can't sleep and I've been waking up at odd times wondering what she's up to and if she's making out with that guy. It's killing me.