To make a long story short, I was the guy she was the girl and we had a rather tumultuous relationship. Both of us did regrettable things to each other, though frankly speaking she did me much worse. Near the end of our 2 year relationship I had grown somewhat hot and cold towards her and this seems to have put her under great stress and she was acting out a lot. I couldn't act as loving as I wished, I was still in love with her but certain things would come back to haunt me at random moments and I would grow cold without explanation.

Days before she left, we were talking about wedding rings and getting married, then suddenly she lets me know she's not sure about the relationship because she's been "growing a lot lately" and wants an "eat pray love moment" and wasn't sure if "[I] was still growing". The next day, she comes back from work at 12:30am, starts crying and says she has to break up with me and she's sorry for "ruining everything". Then she leaves with some of her things and we don't speak except to coordinate the removal of her things from my apartment. That was 1 month ago.

I just can't tell if she said what she said to cover for her guilt of throwing away a 2 year relationship without explanation, or if she's genuinely remorseful. I am left in a strange limbo state where I don't know if I should feel guilty for failing to keep the relationship alive in the final months, or maybe I should feel upset at her for doing what she did when we were talking about tying the knot.

Could someone help me resolve this limbo? I just don't know how to feel.