In my case I had a live-in girlfriend with a Son. She has ADHD, CPTSD, Eating disorders, chronically unemployed, struggles with homelessness, chain smoker, hobosexual, terrible skin, very unnatractive.... yet she lived with me for almost a year on and off. Something about the way I was coping with all of that and giving her all my energy. I was desperate for her to leave my house and move on (because she was not a romantic or affectionate person, very emotionally unavailable and unreliable) but after she left I began to feel Devastated and call her several times per week to rant and cry for hours about how exhausted and heartbroken I was.

To this day I realize I can't afford to take care of her and her kid, have nothing to offer her but criticism. Yet I can't stop worrying about her and her kid. Can't stop feeling responsible. It's such a curse. Must stay no-contact to stay sane and avoid going broke again.

It's my sense of it that when you trauma bond with a person, go through survival and really rely on each other for some time, it's very hard to cut them out of your life. No matter how awful they are.