I'm not actually a part of the ENM community, but I think I might want to be. I'm a 35yo female, bisexual, and have only ever had monogamous (on my end at least) relationships with men. My last relationship ended for many reasons, but one of them was definitely because I felt suffocated and knew that my partner would never go for an open relationship or even an occasional threesome (it was discussed). In previous relationships, I held on so tight to my partner and demanded fidelity so vehemently that I was worried about it all the time (for good reasons, as my partners did cheat on me). Now that I'm single and starting to date again, I want to do things differently. I don't want to be so jealous and anxious worrying about infidelity, and I don't want to feel suffocated and restricted. I want to just relax and enjoy being with whomever I am with.

Has anyone had this experience? Does ethical non monogamy work for you? Why did you choose it?

Thanks for any insight that can help!