I really need some perspective from people who have similar desires to help me understand this.

My husband and I were married about 6 years when he dropped the bomb about his sexual preferences, at first it just started out as fantasy and play (Cuckquean, hotwife, then straight up open marriage). Eventually I wanted to make him happy so we experimented in real life. I know, that’s on me. I’m a people pleaser and anxiously attached. If he told me that it would make him happy to cut off my arm, I would. I am working hard on it through extreme CBT. Anyways, after some time being open I couldn’t handle the insecurity and HE made the decision to close.

My question is, if you decided to close things to make your partner happy, would you the spend the rest of your marriage resenting them? Part of me feels I should just let him go. I know he loves me but I just cannot possibly understand how on earth I can be enough for him when he enjoys nm so much.